These Days, With Spring Just Around the Corner…
…hoping to hold onto the determination to get things done around here.
As Rich and I were out taking a short walk in the yard yesterday, we starting talking about all the things we wanted/needed to get done in the yard and garden. So. Many. Things. And I’ve been lamenting lately all the bazillions of things that I still haven’t accomplished inside the house. It hit me–I can keep on feeling overwhelmed and I can keep on waiting for the miraculous day that the pain and exhaustion of fibro aren’t my nearly constant companions OR I can just tell fibro to go fuck itself and get some things done around here. I know it’s a trade-off. I know I will physically feel even worse, but I will also feel mentally better. After years of trying to strike some balance, trying to make room for fibro and trying to give it some respect, I’ve realized I’m wasting my time. I’m not saying it can’t be done, I’m just saying that I’m just so utterly sick of trying.
…anticipating lots of things.
Like the arrival of my seed order. Despite the utter devastation of last year’s garden by wildlife (especially the deer and groundhogs) and all the frustration and tears that came with it, it’s time to get started on this year’s hopes for a bountiful harvest.
And spring break. Which for me means a week of alone time, as the rest of the gang goes camping. Of course, by alone, I mean no other humans. The couple hours of animal care I must provide by myself on a daily basis while the other humans are gone, most assuredly reminds me that I’m not really alone.
And best of all, finally meeting in person one of the people I love most in this world–Ana!!! And it gets even better–a dream come true: getting to spend a few days hanging out with Ana and Chris (two of the people I love most in this world!!!) together!!! Seriously, I have spent soooo many hours over the past years daydreaming about this very thing. I’ve hesitated saying anything about this–all the details haven’t been totally worked out and I fear jinxing it. But I’m so freakin’ excited that I can’t keep it in any longer!
…enjoying the early signs of spring.
Yeah, I know that totally does not sound like me. I’m never one to wish for the end of my beloved winter. But this year, winter never felt like winter. And instead of continuing to let that depress me, I’m going to look forward to the next glorious season–spring. And the signs are all around us. The geese are back and playing their territorial sliding on the frozen pond games, daffodils are starting to poke their way up through the thawing ground, the redwing blackbirds are back earlier than ever.
…feeling blessed in oh-so-many ways.