Posted in stuff that matters, tidbits and babblings

I choose love.

To be quite honest, I haven’t known what to do with the seemingly ceaseless waves of emotions that have been pounding me over the past couple of days. I have not known what to do or what to say. I have felt at times like I couldn’t breathe. I have felt especially lacking in my ability to process the hatred we’re seeing every day. And I cannot for the life of me understand how we in this country are allowing this hate to become legitimized by the far-right–being full of hate is no longer something one has to keep hidden unless among select company but instead is now something that can be worn with pride in public. The massacre in Orlando–the haters are taking full advantage. They’ve found a way to take the tragedy of people they hate anyway, the lgbtq community and Latinos, and use it to foment yet more hate for Muslims. Can’t help but get the feeling that they sort of view what happened as a win-win-win for themselves. I know that hate is nothing new in this country, just ask any person of color or lgbt person or non-Christian or…

It’s just that shocking, completely heart-breaking events like these batter at the hope we build for a more loving, more just world. I know we all need to fight against losing hope. It is both easier, and harder (because fear can be overpowering), to do that when I think about people like my beautiful, brilliant, loving, ridiculously witty lesbian daughter and my generous, compassionate, give-of-himself-till-he-drops gay bestest friend. But aside from clinging to hope, what can an inarticulate, introverted person who suffers from social anxiety do? I wish I had a voice that could make a difference. I don’t, but I’m so incredibly blessed to have found voices that have not only helped me grow as a person but have continued to build my hope in the future of this world. Voices like Ana’s and Bina’s and Eva’s and Natasha’s and Chris’s…and honestly so many more. Before I discovered book bloggers, my reading was so very narrow in scope, but now my reading is so very rich and wonderful and fulfilling. And all it took to so vastly enrich my life was the effort to seek out diverse authors and diverse stories.

I know I’m rambling. And maybe this isn’t the place where I should be trying to process my thoughts and feelings. But it is the most public place I have of declaring: I choose love over hate. Always. Always. Always.




just a middle-aged lady who gets giddy about lots of things

5 thoughts on “I choose love.

  1. I didn’t say anything at first, but last night… Something set me off and I can’t even remember what it was. So, I said a couple things on Facebook and Twitter and now I will likely vanish back into ‘no comment’ land. We live in a scary world. Loved reading your thoughts. Hugs to you my friend!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You are not inarticulate at all! This is a wonderful post and let me give you a virtual hug! I spend a lot of time on twitter when the news broke and afterwards I needed to take a break. All these horrible things happening every day, I’m doing my best to fight them and teach freedom from oppression here but it is so difficult not to loose hope. I hope the survivors and family are getting lots of support!
    Thanks so much btw, I hope we can all learn from each other, I’m learning a lot fom you and your support is amazing and appreciated! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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