I thought I had left this blog behind. And frankly, after a night of vomiting and ceaseless tears and no sleep, it’s probably not the time to dust off the keyboard. I’m not terribly articulate on the best of days. But here on the worst of days, I don’t know what else to do with all this other than to let some of it out. I know that I need to find something more constructive to do, but right now, I’m still just trying to keep my head above water in this sea of despair.
How long before the already desperately appalling rates of violence in this country against PoC and immigrants and Muslims will skyrocket?
How do I explain to my lesbian daughter and my autistic son why this country has declared them unworthy as human beings?
How long before my dear friend loses his much-needed health insurance?
How long until another loses her disability benefits?
How many more species will be lost forever? How long until there’s no more clean water to drink?
The list of questions is endless. Some of them are beyond my capability to even put them into words.
I know that somewhere there has to be hope. I know that there are so many good, kind, generous, loving, compassionate people in this world.
But right now, the endless string of questions is all my brain seems capable of focusing on.
I know that I can’t succumb to fear…but neither can I ignore it.